Hey y'all!
I took a day off from the blog yesterday, I felt ok yesterday, nothing much to write about, or nothing that would come to my mind. I was reminded late evening of the brain fog I have from Fibro and of the muscle pain. So today I want to talk about it. First off, I had another long night of tossing and turning from this elbow pain! If any of you have any solutions I would welcome them. I get so tired of getting steroid shots and they don't last. I have also done physical therapy and it didn't work either. Having all over nerve pain from the Fibromyalgia is the pits. Last night, my hubby walked up behind me to give me my shoulder massage and I was quickly reminded that I am in a fibro flare! I have had the nerve pain in the elbow driving me crazy but I've had some deep muscle pain in my arms, and ache like the flu but it's not the flu, it's the Fibromyalgia! My husband gives me shoulder massages quite often but last night I couldn't take much, as my muscles felt like big giant bruises. I question why in the world do I have to have Fibro, Sjogren's and Adhesive Arach? I mean all of these things combined can be so exhausting! The pain is unbelievable with all three, especially in a huge flare. There are, ( for me anyway ), different levels of flares. With the Fibromyalgia, my flares consist of fatigue that I can't ignore, muscle pain that when I am touched by anyone, anywhere, it feels like I have a giant bruise. I can't even be lightly tapped on the arm or touch my outer thighs! The knots in my thighs get inflamed and they just ache something terrible! When I first felt those knots, it scared me! I had no idea what they were. My pain Dr. says they are trigger points, but they are actual knots in the muscles or something called lipomas. I have never had a direct answer to that question as to what causes them, except they are trigger points. Maybe they don't really know! I asked one Dr. why they didn't talk to me more about what's going on with the Fibro. I feel like they diagnose you, tell you to take the medicine and throw you out into the world. She told me that it's because they really don't know a whole lot about it yet. I think we as patients, need to read and research all we can to know how to treat ourselves better and advocate for ourselves with Drs. I know more about my Sjogren's and Fibro and AA than my Drs. do because I have read all I can! I don't have all the answers though. I still have the pain. The opiate that I take for my back does not help the joint pain or the muscle pain of Fibromyalgia or Sjogren's, heck it barely helps my back. I take Lyrica too, for the nerve pain in my back and my legs, it helps most of the time. Now about this brain fog! OH MY GOODNESS! Now I tell you, I have a good knowledge of our vocabulary, but when I get into a conversation now, my words fail me! I can't even find the solution to try and explain what I am trying to say, it is embarrassing! Tell me if you do this too, you're in mid sentence, you know what you're going to say but then all of a sudden the next word won't come out, you lost it, and you can't get it back! The name of someone you have known all of your life, won't come to mind or a celebrity that everyone knows, you can't think of their name. You can tell someone what movie they played in or who they married but their name won't come out. This may happen to all people sometimes, but it happens to those of us with Fibro, A LOT! Sometimes I feel like someone who has had a stroke. My Daddy had one and one of his problems is getting out what he wants to say. He knows what he wants to say and can't say it. It is the same thing with Fibro except whatever word it is we want to say is lost until someone else says it for us, that is if we explain what we are trying to say. I will do this with my hubby but most people I just tell them, shoot I lost my train of thought. At least when I am writing, I can use another word with the same meaning and no one ever knows. I use the simplest word I can think of because the big words are the hardest to remember! Ahhhh the joys of Fibromyalgia! Today, I am tired, again because of the tossing and turning last night and probably a little bit of the Fibro fatigue. It's all related, it's all overwhelming and it all just plain out sucks! Sorry but that's the best word I can think of to describe the day to day pain. I honestly do try to keep a good attitude and keep a smile on my face. If I didn't do that, I would be miserable and as much as I deal with daily, I am still happy to be alive, miserable is not how I would describe myself! Isaiah 48:10 says, Behold, I have refined you, but not as silver; I have tried you in the furnace of affliction. The Lord is saying, he tries us and our faith and love for him gains more strength when we are hurting. He refines us so that we may know him better. That's my perspective anyway because it has been my truth. I have sought him more, I have read more, I have prayed more. He has given me this time that I have on my hands now to learn more about him. God bless you all and I pray you all have a no pain, low pain day!
Love to you all!
Cindy
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